For I am involved

I didn’t know that my father-in-law’s death would wreck me, but it has.  It could be that it is the beginning of this part of middle age, the inevitable loss of parents, which up until last week, hadn't yet started.
The anticipation of what is to come, just getting through this last two weeks, it’s rough stuff.
There also apparently, has to be someone that makes things harder.  There must be a clause in the contract of life, stipulating, that one sibling or some relation is going to fuck with what you already think is your darkest hour, and just kick it up a notch.
Thanks.