To see another day

Being as smart as I am, why do I let my self live in terror all the doo-da day? It's plain that I understand anxiety,and have expounded on the theory that it is primal, it's a part of our most basic function to stay alive, and it's merely gone a little overboard in some, or most of us.
I've accepted that being in the ridiculous state of worry is as much a part of me, as, well, me.
THIS HAS ALL BEEN ESTABLISHED.
So why then, does it rule me still! I have and will go to any length to lean up against that status quo, even though I don't want to remain in the same place. So, if it's time for a change, does that mean an internal or external, or do I just skim the surface of modification, move again or try a new regime.
I have finally realized that parental behavior sets a standard, and mine at times, has either been so low that it's negligible or set so high no one could ever stand a chance, not even me.