You're the one who's crazy

All the while I was transcending time and space, Jake has been harboring a bum appendix.
He's been out of town visiting my parents and sister's family which he does every summer to give himself and us a much needed break from conflict-town. So apparently Saw II had a lot to do with his need for an emergency appendectomy as he was watching it the night before and had eaten ice cream while doing so. Had he been here it would have been more serious and problematic because he would have told me his stomach was really hurting and I would have told him to take a tums. Thusly, being around people who actually respond appropriately to shrieks of pain made it possible for him to have a minimally invasive laproscopic procedure and he was home the next day.