That's now departed

For various reasons, my mother and her sister stopped being in contact about ten years before my Aunt died in 2008.
Because of that thorny relationship, our three cousins were never close to my parents, or myself, and my two sisters,  nor us them.  The youngest, Sarah, was the only one to attend any events, as in some  of our weddings and such, in her adult years.
When my Aunt died, I contacted the oldest cousin, and let her know how sorry I was,  that her mom had been someone I truly cared for.
With that, one night last week, or actually the early morning hours, I was not able to sleep, so I thought about taking a look on the Internet for Sarah.  The last time I had checked a few years ago, she did not have a Facebook page, so I first checked there, and then went to the Internet where I found her obituary.
What I don’t want to take away from that is resentment for the other cousins, who chose not to let us know that she had died.  But, that’s my inclination.  I cannot fathom how  meaningless they must think us, to not share that information.  It just breaks my heart.