I've got no reason

Seventh grade is where it really began to break down. My inability to navigate the social topographical maps become so very apparent.I had been invited to a birthday party, it was just a few days into the school year, I was coming from another district so consequently most of the kids were new to me but my first years of elementary had been there so I did know a few.
Mindy A. had asked me if I wanted to come to her party, she was in my homeroom so we would be in close proximity for three or more years. I remember going home that day and taking a nap, waking up and getting a phone call from her asking if I was coming. Luckily, there was someone home to drive me, I was late and had no present.
After that, over the course of Junior High Mindy said about ten words to me. I just had not realized the importance that event would hold on my entire experience.
Recently, a similar event occurred, though it was more of a communication issue rather then somnolence, I still feel the outcast yoke weighing hard. I will never really get it, but I still strive to find a balance between wanting to say fuck it all, I'm no good at this, and walking around with a big fake smile plastered on my face.